A Little Bit About Me

I was born in Portland in February of 1972, to my parents William and Pamela.

At the time of my arrival, my parents had been married just over a year and 1/2; my brother Ronald was nearly 5 years older. With in a few days of my first birthday my younger brother William arrived. It would be 5 more years before my little sister Chaun would arrive on the scene.

 

I weighed in at 8 lbs, 6 oz and was for the most part a happy baby.

 

 

 

 

 

We moved  only 3 times before settling in to our home in Gladstone, where I would spend my school years. I have lots of memories of family trips to the beach and Utah to see my mother's family there. I remember my dad putting up the swing you see below and I remember learning how to ride my tricycle on our little lane. I also have my first memory of abuse at this age. I was only 4 maybe almost 5 at the time. I could tell you what I was wearing and the  kind of day it was. I won't go into details, but please know this shaped my life significantly and changed how I trusted people.

 

The next set of photos are from my preteen days, I was very involved in my church; took baton, jazz, tap and piano lessons. I loved to sing and bake and draw. At this age I did not 'think' I was fat but I was keenly aware that I was bigger than a lot of my friends. I was not teased about it very much and when I was, I usually didn't like the person who was being mean so I brushed it off. I was continually abused by extended family and friends of the family, never telling anyone. I learned from both my parents to 'clean my plate' since the next meal might not be as grand. We also ate lots of 'white food - sugar, flour, potato, pasta, bread' and the like. My mother was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes at just over 45 and my father's diabetes went unchecked (because he was not big on doctors). In his ignoring  the signs he died way to early at age 65. He died from complications of Non alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver. Which means even though my father never drank, he died because his liver turned all his 'sugar food' into alcohol, so he died as though he was a raging drunk. His temper was very volatile in his later years, and his diagnosis explained a lot of that behavior. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In high school, my weight topped out at 144 lbs, and remember thinking I could not possibly get any bigger.  I  spent a year away from home living with a friend and her family to get away from all things my life, hoping to escape from the destructive behaviors of eating  poorly and patterns of abuse that were still all around me.The photo  below  - top left is my senior picture, my junior photo is just below that. By age 20, (top right) I was nearing 190 lbs while working full time at a daycare and nannying. The last photos was taken in July of 1994, the day after Keith and I were engaged and was at my strongest, weighing 160 lbs. I had been attending a Gold's Gym for the year I work in CT and lost nearly 60 lbs of fat.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 I will come back later this month and talk about my struggles with food, and body image.  Just wanted to give a little bio on myself.